Raye's Journey

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Weekly Report #5 Writing, Life

Here is the record and thoughts of Raye during the period from May 7th to June 7th, 2023.

It's been a couple of weeks since I last wrote my own record, and a lot has happened during this time. Some things are not convenient to be made public, so I'll just share what I can haha.


This week, with my perseverance, I finally completed two technical articles, but they are not completely polished yet. I increasingly feel that I need to set limits for myself and actively push myself in order to overcome procrastination.

For example, I found that before I share something, if the manuscript is not ready, I will force myself to work hard to prepare it, and my thinking becomes very flexible, coming up with all sorts of solutions.

In fact, procrastination boils down to a few problems:

  1. Being afraid to start, always thinking about it.
  2. Perfectionism, feeling the need to achieve a certain level of perfection.
  3. Forgetting things frequently.

Behind these problems are three fundamental issues:

  1. Fear.
  2. Compulsion.
  3. Forgetfulness.

So I started to set rules for myself:

  1. Put the writing app I use (Ulysses) in the most easily accessible place and forbid myself from frequently opening WeChat or other entertainment tools.
  2. Set deadlines. For example, if I have to explain something to someone in two hours, can I explain it clearly?
  3. Use TickTick to remind myself, and place TickTick directly in the dock at the bottom of my phone.

As long as you make changes, rewards are inevitable. I'm also happy that I can finally overcome this chronic problem. But as the saying goes, persistence is key.

Random Thoughts#

Aside from the above, I've had many random thoughts recently, whether it's triggered by a scene or obtained from a dream. I record them all in my notes, as if I'm a child catching butterflies. When I look back, it feels like I've captured gaps in history.

On Rogues#

Nowadays, people are not rogues when they should be, but they become "rogues" when they shouldn't be, exposing their ugly side.

The rogue nature of modern people is revealed afterwards. They know they have already lost and cannot make up for it, yet they still deny it and try to gain something through being a rogue, like a shrew cursing on the street or rolling on the ground.

I want to learn from Liu Bang and become a true rogue.

What is a true rogue?

In the past, when Lv Gong held a banquet, many famous people gathered. I dare to say that Qian Wan, without hesitation, rose to a high position, eating, drinking, and talking without any shame.

To dare to be a rogue in a grand occasion, without leaving any trace in one's words, that is a true rogue.

The so-called Wei and Jin style is just an inheritance of the style of the founding emperor.

Unfounded Anxiety#

Studying late at night, feeling a bit anxious, I reflected on it.

For example, when I watch videos on Bilibili, I find that I don't feel anxious. Is it because it's a safe zone?

But when I go to study, I always worry about things that haven't been done yet. Isn't that strange? Actually, I've already made a list of things to do before going to bed, so all I need to do is focus on studying.

This feeling is really strange, isn't it? You can't explain it, but it's wrong and needs to be corrected.

You must make an unfamiliar field your comfort zone.

Laughing and Arguing#

Excerpt from "A New Account of the World":

Wang laughed and said, "Your presence has ruined our interest."

WeChat and Mi Chat#

Recently, I read about Lei Jun's thoughts:

When Xiaomi was just established, following the "hardware + software + internet" model of "Ironman Triathlon 1.0," while working on the smartphone system and preparing the smartphone hardware team, Xiaomi took the lead in launching the instant messaging project "Mi Chat" based on smartphones in China, which initially gained a significant first-mover advantage. At that time, I had a judgment that if Tencent did not react within a year, Mi Chat would have a 50% chance of success; if there was a reaction within six months, Mi Chat would have little chance. However, the result was that Tencent reacted within a month, and Tencent Research Institute quickly launched WeChat with strong support from Tencent Group.
With the high-concurrency backend technology accumulated from millions of people being online at the same time and the advantages in social relationship chains, coupled with the huge advantages of comprehensive resources such as company size, WeChat gradually surpassed Mi Chat.
Xiaomi, as a small startup, could not support both the investment in mobile internet instant messaging and the smartphone market, so we gave up Mi Chat and put all our efforts into the smartphone field.

We have always been talking about WeChat surpassing Mi Chat, but we have never talked about Lei Jun's active abandonment of Mi Chat.

So this also explains why most people cannot learn from history. Because what everyone sees are the successful ones, the survivors, but they never think about the choices made by the "failures."

The choices made by the "failures" are often the most important.

On Education#

Recently, I read "A New Account of the World" and learned about the Wei and Jin style.

I deeply feel that our education is too serious now, lacking smiles.

Look at the ancients, each one was wild and unrestrained. If evaluated according to the current education system, they would definitely be the ones who are constantly scolded by teachers and called in by parents, and their classmates would deliberately stay away from them.

Just because they are out of touch with the times, they would be isolated, scolded, and mocked mercilessly. No wonder Zheng Yuanjie wanted to expose the evil of education by taking pictures of railings. Not only do Chinese people have a great leap in association with "sex," but they are also very quick to degrade and destroy a person.

"Generalissimo Chiang's Face"#

Random thoughts after watching (I originally wrote "impressions after watching," but I dislike it. I prefer to use the words "random thoughts"):


In life, there is nothing more than being in the world or out of the world, or being in between. It is becoming an official writer, choosing the Wei and Jin style, or fighting to the end in anger. But in the end, we are all swept along by the times. Can we blame them? If it were us, who could do better? We are not like Su Wu, enduring the loneliness of shepherding, nor are we like Wen Tianxiang, who is chosen by history. We are not even like Tan Sitong, who dared to shed blood and sacrifice for reform. We are ultimately just insignificant characters in history, destined to have ordinary endings amidst the push and pull of the times.

Thoughts on the "Heavenly Mandate" of History#

I'm just jotting down some thoughts. Recently, I watched videos by Bo Hai Xiao Li and his interpretation of Chinese history. Sometimes it feels like there is indeed a heavenly mandate in the world.

For example, in the same region of Hanzhong, in history, only Han Xin was able to pacify the Three Qins. But during the Three Kingdoms period, a major earthquake in Wudu caused the Han River to change its course, greatly increasing the threshold for supplying the army during the northern expedition, and ultimately leading to the Battle of Wuzhang Plains. When I finished watching that episode of Xiao Li's video, I truly felt that history seemed to have a heavenly mandate. The rise of the Han dynasty began with the Han River, and when the Han River was cut off, the dragon vein was also cut off. It really feels like the heavens wanted to destroy the Han dynasty.

(There are many similar examples. When I truly followed in Xiao Li's footsteps and reminisced, I often had this feeling.)

True Farewell#

In fact, true farewells don't have ancient pavilions or ancient roads, or persuading each other to drink more wine. It's just a peaceful morning, with some people staying in yesterday.


Night tour of Shenzhen Bay on June 3rd.


Interesting Things#

Recently, I have also started managing my own Telegram channel, where I share articles and experiences. Feel free to subscribe.

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